Thinking Thursday...A journey to stop smoking

Self in thought, originally uploaded by torri_g.

Oh another week has passed and I was looking forward to being able to come here and say that had 16 days...two complete weeks plus two days without smoking. Instead I can tell you that I had 15 straight days without a cigarette, which really isn't a small deal for me. At the appointment to check progress and get next month supply of medicine on Monday Ms. K. A. was very happy with my progress. When I did the breathing test to check the carbon monoxide levels there was no way to make it any more clear just how happy I was with my number than throwing my arms up in the air and doing a cheer of "YES!" From a number of 60 to 4 in just three weeks, something to celebrate really. By the way the average non smoker has a number of 1-5, and I had a reading of being a non smoker and I could not have been happier about that.

Now to share about yesterday. Yesterday I made a choice, and heaven knows I may make the choice again, but I'm not going to hide it because that isn't going to get me anywhere with this. I smoked...I smoked 5 cigarettes. Why? Because I wanted them. Because after trying to fight the urge for half of the day my body and mind were making life miserable for me. But mostly because I made the choice to smoke them and nothing more. I have a lot of habits that I have to learn to redirect while making this journey. Yesterday, my biggest and possibly hardest one won because I chose to let it. When I lit the first one Binky Sue was close enough to see what was going on and hear me say "I'm sorry". She thought I was talking to her, but I was saying sorry to myself. Now no I'm not beating myself up about it here, but I really did feel sorry about for myself. 15 days of being able to beat the cravings and urges, and all gone just like that. Each one I sat and smoked I thought about that and wanted it less and less and by evening wanted to get going forward on the journey again instead of the backwards step that I had taken. After all it is one day, and today is a new day. What I know today is that I'm not giving up. I really do want to quit and will work hard every day to achieve that...but odds are still very high that I'm going to have days where I will make a choice to smoke and I need to deal with that by picking back up and going at it yet again the day after.

So here I am on day one again, and in that pack that was opened three weeks ago there is still one. My goal for the next week, to be able to return next week with one full week, and maybe a new way of dealing with some things.

Little Bug & the case of strep throat

Little Bug, originally uploaded by torri_g.

The picture is from a couple of weeks ago, because I'm pretty sure if I were to point my camera in Little Bugs direction right now she very well may beat me with one of my own crutches. Army Guy was off like a flash with Little Bug yesterday morning to the clinics to find out if I was right with my thought of strep throat. Sure enough I was correct, and Little Bug now has a arsenal of medication. Strep throat plus cold equal a very miserable Little Bug! However, hopefully since we have the medications now she will be feeling better soon. I'm hoping that this is all for the family take down with this summer cold stuff. Binky Sue started it and Little Bug kicked it up a notch and that is more than enough already because I don't care to see where Sweetpea takes this to. Oh and I don't want my visiting girl (who we are working on a nick name for) to get sick while staying with us.

Speaking of all my girls, I need to mention what great help they have been since Tuesday night. They have taken over the cooking, and cleaning. Heck they have even taken on the giving of lectures. Most of the lectures are being given to me about taking it easy, and "just where are your crutches Mommy?" and "Why didn't you call one of us to help you?" I have to admit that they are very good with the lectures though. They really must have been paying attention all these years.
I have follow up on Monday for my knee and then there will be some other errand running for another appointment later in the week. I hope Army guy doesn't get tired of having to drive me all over the place.

Well now with all of the major distraction from Binky Sue and Mimi or Jojo and Mojo the bad little monkeys (which is what they are going to be called for now). I'm going to say that I hope that everyone has a great Saturday and enjoys a day filled with laughter surrounded with those you care about the most.

Things that make you shake your head in wonder

I know a record three posts in one day, even better no picture with this one. Sometimes there is paper work that rolls through this house and across my desk that leave me shaking my head in wonder. Tonight there is just such a paper sitting on my desk in front of me. The paper work is basically simple enough, just a graduation behavioral contract for the seniors. However, as I read through the thing there are a couple of things that just catch the eye in it. Rule #3 about the dress code and seeing tennis shoes listed as proper formal dress attire? Also in rule #3 the decorating of the mortarboards is covered and several friends of mine heard about this one on the phone when the order was placed for the cap and gown. They are allowing the students to decorate their mortarboards, but in rule three they want them to keep all profanities, gang related writing/symbols or pornography off of them. Well, I guess that makes the decorating of the mortarboards okay then...NOT! They also have advice that if you have a questionable decoration idea that they should see an administrator prior to the graduation. Yep, I'm sure that will work out well. From there you move on to rule #4 which I'm just going to type out exactly as it appears on this contract sitting in front of me and see who is really reading and paying attention.

• I will not bring and or use fireworks, alcohol, drugs, weapons, animals, water balloons, water guns, tortillas or any other food products to any senior week activity, including graduation.

Now let's play the game of can you catch the word that caught my attention the most in that sentance. Actualy there are two words that left me re-reading it over and over again, and giving Binky Sue a look of "What in the world?" I understand the fireworks. I understand the alcohol, drugs, weapons. I understand the water ballons, water guns. I understand the other food products. But animals, and tortillas are one's that I never would have expected to see listed. Since those two are listed my thoughts are that someone or several someone's have done something in the past graduations with those things. So now they feel the need to list them all out to make it very clear? But the bigger question in my head right now is who in the world arms themselves with tortilla's when going to their graduation ceramony? Even better question is WHY?

This is one of those things that is going to leave me shaking my head for probably the next couple of days, but the contract is signed now by both Binky Sue and myself and she will return it to the school come Monday so hopefully they will be happy that they have at least one that agrees to no involving animals or tortilla's at graduation. Anyone heading out this way come May should probably make sure that you have camera's handy because this sure sounds like it could be some kodak moments that you just might not want to miss. To bad they are going to have to come up with something that isn't on the specific list now.

Sibling Sunday Insanity

IMG_1980, originally uploaded by torri_g.

Back to beautiful weather here in Arizona this weekend, and we have been getting a lot of packing up stuff to head to donation done. But of course since it is Sunday we had to take some time to goof around and what better way than to head out to the back yard with Mom's camera in hand. Alright, so I'm pretty sure the girls would have preferred if I had not come up with the idea at all, but they tried to do all the things that I asked them to. Okay, okay, okay...so I didn't really ask them I kind of just told them that they were doing this for me. Geez! They did have fun though and that is what counts most, and now I'm not the only female in this family that looks insane doing strange things in the back yard.


This month is flying by and so is the school year since we are within a week of progress reports coming home. Binky Sue has college and financial aid work shop this week, plus the studying for the February 7th ACT continues. Sweetpea and Little Bug just seem to be in relax mode with school right now, which is always a good thing. We never need them all three stressing at the same time. The reason for the pictures for today's entry...well this weekend has kind of been just like this with them. Kind of a mild bouncing around, running at me from all directions, and jumping up and down trying to be the one that I focus my attention on. I can honestly say that I'm looking forward to them returning to school tomorrow.

Anyway, I hope that everyone has had a weekend filled with time spent with those you care about the most. Oh and I hope that this is a week filled with good things for everyone.